Sep 19, 2008

Play of the Mind

I had a bizarre dream/nightmare last night. I was still in Primary School and the most bizarre thing was one of my classmate, the one sitting next to me was my own niece! Dinnah who was half the age I am. Imagine even if I'm in Primary 6, she was still unborn then...
The story of the dream was at that day and age, children below the age of 16 are prohibited to have adult aka romantic feelings; even to artists or celebrities - if found out they will be carted off to the nearest psychiatric ward and labelled mentally unbalanced/ill. (Bwoh, Dinnah! ^_^ Baik jua it's only in my dream) There I was, after checking this blog and found several posts that I never wrote regarding infatuation over some girl named Noralinda (I racked my brain and couldnt remember if I had former classmate by that name). I was like - who broke into my blog??? My brother? Impossible - the english was too fluid, plus my brother writing jiwang poems?? Laughable! In that dream, I also had this habit of printing out my posts and putting it in a file - I check that file, and sure as rain there were printouts of that posts in the file.
I went to school and my brain was still buzzing, what the teacher was hammering about at the front went unheard. Was I losing my mind? Am I some kind of Schizo? (Haha... I dont think I know what a schizo is when I was in Primary School, only know one kind of craziness - just plain OG). So I went to the toilet to washed my face. My primary school bestfriend Rumaizah was in a class next to mine. When she saw I passed by her class on the way to the toilet, she went out also. In the toilet, she asked me If I'm feeling all right, answered I'm fine; just feeling nauseatic a bit. She was being sympathetic; pat my back, hand me a tissue.
By the time I went back to the class, a new period had started, the one taught by Cikgu Pg Hj Salleh, one of our strictest teacher (well, not the most strict - just the one who showed no favoritism...to me). Just before the teacher started to teach, Aminah (again another one of my Primary School bestfriend) walk to his desk and telling him about how I had this blog, and what I wrote on that blog. She snatched my notebook from my hands and showed him the written instruction how to access that blog. I was rendered speechless, surprised beyond words - lots of activity inside my brain; every thought going on at once. Aminah came to my table again and rummage my schoolbag. She found my blog's file and hand it over to the teacher. (What kind of idiot bring that file to school?) Satisfied with all her evidence, she went back to her seat.
Then Cikgu Pg Hj Salleh started questioning me:
PHS: Is it true, this is your blog?
Me: Yes, Sir. But...
PHS: Do you know this stuff is prohibited for kids your age and you could...
Me: Yes, I know sir. But I created that blog to write a review on tv dramas that I watched and books that I read. I thought it will helps me in my english and sharpen my composition skills (Hahaha...as if! I didnt check my grammar when I wrote and I dont care if anyone read it will understand or not). Those posts...the recent posts, I never wrote it, Sir.
PHS was flipping through the blog file and some magazine clippings (where the hell does this clippings come from?!)
PHS: So you never made this? (Showing a bookmark made from a picture of some male artist I dont know of)
Me: No, Sir! I did some before but I was wayyyyy over it now. It becomes boring. Sir, may I ask a question? (He nods for me to go ahead)
Me: How did Aminah know where to find the instruction to go to my blog in my notebook? And I'm not an idiot, even if I need reminders of my blog address or password, I'm not that stupid to wrote it in my school notebook. And the handwriting wasnt even mine! (His eyebrows come together, thinking hard. He's kinda slow here, that I need to pointed out that fact to him)
PHS: Aminah, bring your notebook here! (Heavy footed now, she come to the front with her notebook; obviously there's no CSI showing then, or else she could planted better evidence, one that doesnt pointed back at her)
The handwriting matched the instruction in my notebook. But still PHS keeps flipping through the pages. He found some glued-together pages and proceed to ripped them unglued. There in the hidden pages was written conversation between Aminah and some unknown accomplice. She asked him/her to try dig up some secrets from Dinnah that could get me in trouble but that person couldnt get Dinnah to say negative things about me except, I'm "udang yang akan jadi bubuk"?? I asked Dinnah who sat next to me what does that mean, but she just cover her face embarrased. Then, about three of my classmate came to the front and stand next to Aminah saying they helped her planting the evidence too after Rumaizah tells them about the blog.
I was really suprised and pissed off. Why did they hate me so? Its not a crime to be a teachers' pet when I didnt abuse it for my own benefit right? Was this what I think of them then (talam 2-muka; but I dont think so- childhood friendship was pure with no hidden agenda) or was this just a reflection of my present state of mind- don't trust anybody even your bestfriend. (See, at this stage in this dream I kinda know I'm dreaming). Rumaizah was called from the class next door and I was facing the culprits stand in a row in front of the class...Suddenly!
Knock! Knock! Are you awake? Argh! I was fighting to stay asleep. I wanna know what the punishment will be, I wanna see them get punished (hehe...vindictive). Another knock and the door pushed open, "Something wrong with my mobile..." The dream vanished and I am fully awake.

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